Who pastors the pastor?

I realize that I have a lot of time to think at this exact moment, and I do not know that that is a great thing.

I have had a lot of time to spend  thinking about this subject.  Who takes care of the pastor when HE needs the care?

I know that this post may come from some raw feelings because of our recent situation, but I really want to know.  I was wondering about this subject long before this all happened.

When a pastor finds himself in a rough situation who is ready to take care of him?  Who should be there to take care of him?  Who provides him with support that he so willingly offers others?  Who is there to listen to his cares and woes?

I know that in our situation, many people have been so willing to come to our aid.  I had more visitors that they would let me have at the hospital.  We have meals being delivered.  We have people offering help in anyway that they can.  But this is not what I am talking about. I want to know who helps make sure that the pastor is okay.

He has been scared witless because his wife has been sick.  He has had to a lot of things to deal with mentally and emotionally.  So who takes care of him?

I know that, yes, he has God.  He has the Comforter.  However, anyone who lives in this world knows that people need other people to surround them.

I think that my husband needs that, and he has not been given that from the people that I think he should be there for him.  It is a tough thing for a wife to watch.  Tough stuff.



Misadventures of Tancy… and Eva

People often shake their head as I tell of my misadventures. I don’t know why trouble seems to follow me, but it just does. I think it is because I like to have fun…. or something like that.  I was reminded of this event last week when I was at the lake and talking of an old friend who recently lost her father.   I guess this stuff has been happening to me my whole life.

Many years ago my parents had a Chevy Malibu.  It was one in a long line of large and rough cars.  My parents did not have a lot of cash to dump into cars because they were busy trying to afford private school, and so we drove what we could find.  It did not have to look pretty, it just had to run.

When I was fourteen or fifteen, I had a friend named Eva.  Eva was seven years older than me, and she could drive.  I would leave my house on foot, and she would leave her house on foot, and we would meet halfway at the hospital.  Then, we would return to my house, and my parents would let us borrow the Malibu!

We drove that thing everywhere.  Gas was still less than $1.00 a gallon, and Eva had a job, so off we went.  The Malibu had a trick though…. In order to start it, while Eva turned the key and pressed on the gas, I had to pull a specific set of wires under the dash.  Vrooom!  We were ready to go.

One particular day we were running about town we went to American TV.  I have no idea WHY we went there, but we were there for some reason.  After doing our shopping, we came back out and got into the Malibu.

You can imagine the shock when I realized that someone had completely torn up the front seat of the car!  The arm rests were messed up.  I looked in the back seat in horror.

Eva!  They ripped out the speakers!!!  There are empty holes with wires coming out in the back window!

Are you sure?

Eva!  There is garbage everywhere!  My dad is going to kill me!

Oh my!

Eva!  There is a hole in the back of this seat!

Lots of shrieks.

Eva!  They took my dad’s sunglasses!  He has had those FOREVER!  He’s going to kill us!

More panic

Oh. My. Word. EVA! They stole the glove compartment!

Um Tancy….What’s that over there?

We quickly grabbed our packages and walked to aisles to an identical Malibu.  This one had all its seats intact, no holes with protruding speaker wires because there were no speakers in the rear window, and my dad’s glasses in the seat.

We quickly drove away.

My God Will Supply… His way

As my feet hit the floor this morning, my might was reeling with the things that I was planning on accomplishing.  I was had high hopes for the day.

The day headed south when I logged onto my bank account and saw a VERY negative balance.

Don’t panic it turned out to be bank errors, but this set the tone for the day!

Thing after little thing went not so right.

A few hours later when the mechanic called to talk to me about Betty, I felt like it hit a new low.

I was sure Betty needed a good alignment, and she would be good to go.  We dropped her off yesterday and I was happily stranded at home today.  When my phone rang early in the day, I did not think it was very good news, and I was right.

The mechanic informed me that they were unable to do the alignment because what Betty really needed was upper AND lower ball joints. ON BOTH SIDES.

and no… it would not be cheap.  $650 to be exact.

I sat down to catch my breath completely discouraged and despondent, and was comforted by this still small voice…

“I’ve got this.”

An amazing peace came over me, and I made my calls and went on the way trying to navigate the new waters I found myself in.

Knowing that He had it in control gave such peace, but I am ashamed to say how I limit Him with my own mind.  I kept waiting for a knock on the door and a random check to show up for exactly $650 or the wonderful mechanic to call back and offer to do it for only the cost of parts. I was working on the way I THOUGHT God should and would act.

Instead, God had already prepared the help.

My parents.

My dad took a few extra hours off work.  He figured out what he needed to do, and he went to work.  He has never done ball joints on a vehicle that size, but he jumped in with both feet. They bought us the parts, and he worked at it until he finished it.  I JUST got home and it is 11:00 p.m. and my dad has been at it since 12:30.   He has to be up before 5:00 tomorrow morning.

The old parts were rusted on and they were a nightmare to take off.   The new ones took a while to go back on.  It just was not an easy task.  It was a labor intensive task and he just kept working.

Thankfully, God prepared help for him too!  My uncle Roc immediately volunteered to help him.  AND when he needed to go home, Steve R (Who refuses to let me post the picture of him) helped until we put the last tool away.

So often, I put God in this box of how I think He should act to supply my needs.

He says He is faithful to supply my needs.  He gets to do it HIS way.  Sometimes those ways are set up in your own family, and God uses them to bless you.

Amazed and humbled.


This is my family. I blame JP.

I do not now why I am shocked any more.  I have been part of this family for 16 years, and I helped create the monster that it is, but I still get shocked.

My children are harboring a fugitive.

With their father’s blessing.

Yesterday morning, I heard delighted screams coming from the garage and I assumed that they had seen yet another chipmunk running through the garage.  I also ASSUMED, that the boys would be running for their BB guns next, to kill said chipmunk.

Instead, I was shocked to find out the although there was a chipmunk involved, this time they were EXCITED because #2 was in possession of the chipmunk!  She had a six foot section of PVC pipe held up chest high with a chipmunk inside!

Mom, dad, two interns, and all kids come running, and somewhere in the excited chaos SOMEONE comes up with the INSANE idea that we should KEEP the chipmunk… even if just for a while.

WHAT?  Wait?

Did someone ask Mom?

Did someone consider the possiblility that that thing could KILL us with rabies? Mange?  Plague?  Hanta Virus?


Chicken Pox?


You know, that thing must me a KILLER!

 photo Killerchipmunk.jpg

OH but he is SOOO cute, we are going to KEEP HIM!  .…um, no

and give him a name….NO!

and teach him to do tricks…NOOO!!

and keep in him in a cage…
 photo eabb83e9-c63b-476c-8ae6-42e92d6ab5e9.jpg

I gave him French fries and pumpkin seeds… He ate the fries.  He must belong here.

Yes.. this is my family…and I love them!

By the way, I will really miss Alvin when we release him at the park later today.  


*disclaimer:  this post has to do with MANY, MANY examples that I have observed in recent YEARS.  This is directed at NO one person or persons.  It is  general observations about the church body as a whole INCLUDING ME! (not only my church family - friends are dealing with this too) This is a battle I have fought myself and I know I have not completely won. This post is not meant to offend, it is meant to provoke thought.    

Yeah, I know I have your attention now.

Could you even imagine?

Imagine a yearly event, when everyone aired their grievances with one another.  Scream. Yell.  Punch. Kick. Swing.  All out mayhem!  Get out those frustrations!!!!

REALLY! ?!    Is that what we want with our BROTHERS and SISTERS in CHRIST?

Is this the way we treat FAMILY?

Well then WHY do we have such anger and bitterness among us?

In the recent months, I have seen countless examples of discord among God’s people.

People who just can not get along.
People filled with jealousy.
People with personality conflicts.
People filled with anger.
People with grudges.

It seems to be running rampant among the body of Christ, and I am amazed at how many people do not see it as an issue.

“I mean, Goodness, I have not been out stealing or murdering anyone, so does it really matter than I don’t want to sit on that side of the church so I do not have to talk to that person?”

They figure their little grudge is not a big deal, I mean “Who will it really hurt?” They figure it will not matter if it is dealt with or not.   They figure “Why cause trouble stirring it up?” They figure it is not their problem, it is the OTHER person’s problem.

I try and keep my answer the same.

Biblical Conflict Resolution

Matthew 18:15-17

15 “If your brother sins against you, go and tell him his fault, between you and him alone. If he listens to you, you have gained your brother. 16 But if he does not listen, take one or two others along with you, that every charge may be established by the evidence of two or three witnesses. 17 If he refuses to listen to them, tell it to the church. And if he refuses to listen even to the church, let him be to you as a Gentile and a tax collector.

The Bible has given us the perfect plan for dealing with these problems, and I am not even going to pretend it is easy.  Although, I WILL  say  that if you need to “hide” behind something that God has pretty big shoulders for you to hide behind when dealing with something the RIGHT way.  You can rest in the fact that you are dealing with the problem the correct way.

Why do we want to hold these things in?  It hurts our brothers and our sisters.  They are our family!  We are to LOVE each other.  We are to esteem other higher than ourselves! (Phil. 2)  And yet, we skulk around harboring feeling as we delete them from our friends lists and move pews at church.

This is the way we expect unChristians to act, and yet we do the same.  We avoid, harbor, and begrudge all while lifting our hands in worship, opening our Bibles, and lifted our hands for prayer requests.

Can you imagine what power the Holy Spirit may unleash on God’s church if we would just do what we were supposed to and put away childish things and get over ourselves!?!

I can’t help but think of this verse.  

James 4:17

17 So whoever knows the right thing to do and fails to do it, for him it is sin.

When are we going to get serious about what REALLY matters and not about who irritated us?

It is not always fun.  It is not always easy.  However, it is what we are supposed to do.  We are supposed to go to each other, and then put aside out difference so we can work together for the cause of Christ.

People are lost and dying in a corrupt world and we are busy worrying about whether or not someone looked at us funny or does like the way we did something.

We are COMMANDED to be about His work, and we are too busy licking our wounds and feeding our anger to do what we know is right.

God help us.

Let it begin with me.