Dead stuff everywhere.

One of the reasons I love to go for a run is that I have that time ALONE.  I am alone in my thoughts and I can process my day.  I also LOVE to pray when I run.  God and I have some of the most wonderful chats when I am running.  We get so many things worked out 🙂

Yesterday while I was running, I kept seeing sad little dead things on the road.  Black birds, sparrows, starlings, a possum, toads, countless worms that thought they were crawling to a non-drowning safety on the asphalt.  I was reminded of the fact that my amazing God knows each one of these creatures have met their demise.

Matthew 10:29 “Are not two sparrows sold for a penny? Yet not one of them will fall to the ground apart from the will of your Father.”

My first thought was that I was just looking for things… those are common occurrences in nature.  Quit looking for something in nothing.

Not one minute later, I say a beautiful, blue hummingbird dead on the side of the road (Which is NOT common), and I knew that it was no mistake.

At first when I was contemplating the message God had for me, I was thinking that He sees the sparrow and He cares.  He knows.

Now, when looking at the verse in Matthew, I see it in a whole new light.

It isn’t just that He knows, it is His will.

It isn’t just a knowledge.  His will is being carried out day by day throughout all of His creation.

And, here sits Tancy.   So sure of herself as she plods through her days — doing things her way.  Sure, when things get tough, I turn for help when I can’t make things work out MY way.  He made me a strong individual, so surely he wants to to work things out myself.  Right??

His will.

I don’t need to worry, because He has got it all worked out.

Who am I to think I need to figure out anything on my own when I have the One who is making all the decisions as my guide?


Help me to remember who the boss really is.  Thank You Lord.


SURPRISE – if you ruin it…. I will be most unhappy.

I have hesitated to write about our big surprise because I want there to be no chance that it may get ruined.  I just have to get it out, so I am giving it a whirl. Soon to be teenager will not  get his facebook going until after the trip, so I think I will be in the clear.  AND ANYONE WHO READS THIS WILL KEEP THEIR MOUTHS SHUT  🙂  Right ?!?!?

We are going on a trip.  We have been anticipating this trip for months.  We wanted to go last year, but it just wasn’t happening, so we planned for this year. We want to head east and see battlefields — Lots and lots of battlefields and Civil war memorabilia. I know, I know, some of you (Julie) are rolling your eyes and muttering “What nerds” under you breath, but nerds we are.  Besides the fact that history is cool, I  want to pass that knowledge and love of knowledge to our children.  I want them to see how we got here as a nation, and not just read about it every other year in US history.

During tax season, I started hassling my mom about getting a time share booked.  (We are going with my parents, and they own a time share.  YEAH!)  Life simply was too crazy, and no time share reservations were made.  Tax season ended; mom and dad went on their own vacation. No time share reservations were made.  My mom finally called, and the closest place we could stay was in Baltimore.  It was farther than we wanted (Hershey, PA) but we could make it work.  Now to pick a week… more waiting.

I was beginning to think we were never going to get to go.  I was preparing to let our kids down once again, and my mom came up with an idea.  Now, if you know my mom, you know her ideas.  You just NEVER KNOW what she may come up, but she almost always pulls it off.

A week ago, they pop over to help me with a project, and when we are working alone she asks me, “How much money are you planning on spending to go to Pennsylvania?”  I tell her how much we were saving, and that we were planning on cooking in the rental, and saving as much money as we could, blah, blah, blah…   Well, she looks at me and says, “So, if we gave you $X more money, what would you think about going to Orlando in two weeks? It will be my 60th birthday, and what greater way to spend it than with my family?”


Orlando? Disney World?  Florida?  The vacation that we feared we could never take?

I mentioned it to JP, wondering what he would say, and he was pretty tickled too.  Every kid dreams of going to Florida, and our kids are the perfect age for this adventure.   The only trick was figuring out if he could get his ducks in a row for jobs and churches in that short of a time.  He made it work, and we are GOING!!!!

Now the surprise… Our kids think we are going to Pennsylvania.   They are so excited, and can’t wait to see it all.  The other day, we sat and colored US maps with states that each member of our family has been to.  We are going to take the maps with us in the car, and color in the states as we go, all the way to “Pennsylvania.”

There is a pool being formed, and your guesses of which child, and approximately when and where they will discover that we are headed the wrong way will be due before we leave 🙂

I am not old enough for this!

In five short days, we will be parents of a teenager.

In five days he can have his own Facebook account.

In one year he will be headed to high school.

In three years he can legally operate a motor vehicle without an adult there to panic.

In five years he will graduate from high school.

In eight years, he will be the age I was when I got married.

In nine years he will be the age that I was when I had him.

Please tell me where the time has gone?

Earlier today, I was discussing this very topic when someone said, “Whew!  You’d better watch out. I know what I was doing at 13!”

My first thoughts were that there is NO way this child could be doing such things.  He still likes his Legos…. A LOT! He still tortures his little sister, and happily keeps his nose in a book.  He still PLAYS!

But I was…


At thirteen, I made my first mini skirt (out of a longer skirt) and used the remants to make my first tube top.  I then sported said mini skirt and said tube top with a HOT PINK knit cardigan, scrunchie socks, and a side pony tail whenever I could sneak around in it.

At thirteen, I had been kissed during study hall at my christian school.

At thirteen, I would sneak around to listen to Bon Jovi on my walkman.

At thirteen, I tried my first beer while on vacation with a friend at her grandparents house at a lake. (AND… we watched MTV!) [insert sarcastic remark here]

And all of this with parents who were tough!  All this, and my parents didn’t know until I felt guilty and fessed up much later in life.  They didn’t know! I am guessing they didn’t think I was capable of such atrocities!

I think back to my Lego playing-near teenager and I wonder what in the world I could be missing?!?  I don’t want to be a suspicious crazy lady, but am I naive?  Could my innocent young boy be sneaking around all while I think he is still just an innocent young boy? Maybe I am right, but maybe I am wrong.

I realize that I can’t borrow trouble, and I know that he is safely and securely in his FATHER’S hands.  I know that I wasn’t saved at thirteen, and thank YOU LORD, he is.

All I can do is keep him in prayer, beg God to guide him, and beg that he stays open to His guiding.  I must stay vigilant, and not put my head in the sand, but his future is not in MY HANDS.


I surely would really mess that poor kid up.